NEWS FLASH…..NEWS FLASH

November 30th, 2007 3:06 pm by Lapin

The European Commission has just announced an agreement that English will be the official language of the EU – rather than German (the other possibility previously under consideration). As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty’s Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement, and has accepted a 5-year phase-in of new rules, which would apply to the language and reclassify it as “EuroEnglish”.


The agreed plan is summarized below:

In year 1, the soft ‘c’ will be replaced by ‘s’ :

Sertainly, this will be a selebrated improvement from virtually everyone’s perspective.

Also, the hard ‘c’ will be replased by the letter ‘k’.

This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan now have one less letter.

A growing publik enthusiasm in expekted in year 2

when the troublesome ‘ph’ is replaced with the fonetically simplified ‘f’.

This will reduse the labor intensity of spelling ‘fotograf’ by a full 20%.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage

where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a

deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent ‘e’s in the language is disgrasful

and that the combined European language should eliminat them.

By year 4, peopl wil be reseptiv to lingwistik korektions such as replasing

‘th’ with ‘z’ , and ‘w’ with ‘v’ (saving stil mor keyboard spas).

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary ‘o’ kan be dropd from vords kontaining

‘ou’ and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After ze fifz year, ve vil hav a reli sensibil riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls of difikultis

and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech

ozerΓ’l

ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!! VE VIL AL SPIK LIK EUROPEANS !!

LOL!!!!

Similar Posts:

Recent Posts:

5 Responses to “NEWS FLASH…..NEWS FLASH”

  1. 1
    Awzzman Says:

    kan va trangkai pui om chuang lo em mai..duh leh lo ti mai2 rohse

    Report this comment

  2. 2
    father_sphinx Says:

    HAHAHA

    Report this comment

  3. 3
    Lapin Says:

    nui vak suh father.. i dul a thuar leh vek a nge.lol

    Awzzman: i trangkai pui mai thei a nia, difikultis han ti teh chhin, hmui a zum put mai. hahaha.

    Report this comment

  4. 4
    father_sphinx Says:

    lolz.. a thuar vek tawh zawk….hahaha

    Report this comment

  5. 5
    tetea_t Says:

    Lol! :D

    A tawp lamah khi chuan German te pawh a ang deuh reuhin ka hria

    ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!!

    Report this comment

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.